Older siblings can make or break a newborn session — not because they’re difficult, but because how they feel about being there matters. When they’re engaged and at ease, the photos of them with the baby are often the ones families come back to.

Here’s how I approach it.

1. Start With Them

Before we focus on the baby at all, I spend time connecting with the older sibling — getting down to their level, asking about what they’re into, following their lead. Sometimes I’ll bring a small gift based on what parents have mentioned. It signals that this session is for them too, not just the new baby.

2. Read Where They Are

Some kids are immediately excited and want to jump in. Others need to observe for a while before they’re ready. Both are completely normal, and I don’t push either direction. I’ve worked with enough kids to know when to engage and when to step back.

3. Let Them Lead

Kids are more comfortable when they have some control over what’s happening. If a sibling wants to show me their room, their favorite toy, or their spot on the couch — we go there. If they need a snack break or want to do something completely unrelated for a few minutes, that’s fine too.

4. Spend Some Time Just on Them

Partway through the session I’ll often spend a few minutes focused just on the older sibling — not with the baby, just them. Capturing who they are right now. Parents almost always love these photos.

5. Work With Their Interests

Before the session, I ask parents what their child is into. That information shapes how I engage with them. If they love trains, we might use the bed as an engine. If they’re obsessed with a particular toy, we’ll bring it in. Familiar things help kids relax.

6. Make It Silly

Funny faces, ridiculous jokes, unexpected moments — these tend to produce the most genuine photos. Kids don’t need to be serious or cooperative. They just need to be themselves.

7. Make Space for the Real Feelings

A new sibling is a big deal, and not always in an easy way. I don’t push kids to perform happiness about it. If they want to talk about what’s hard or what they’re not sure about, I let them. Those conversations often lead to some of the most honest moments in a session.

A Few Things That Tend to Work

Some specific activities that reliably create good sibling moments:

• Counting the baby’s fingers and toes together
• Asking if the baby’s feet smell (always gets a reaction)
• Letting them feel how soft the baby’s hair is
• Showing them how the baby can hold their finger
• Using safe stickers on the baby’s hand

None of these need to be forced. If they happen naturally, great. If not, we move on.

Book an In-Home Newborn Session in the Bay Area

If you’re expecting and have older kids at home, I’d love to hear about your family. Learn more about newborn and Fresh 48 sessions, or get in touch to start planning.